The top 10 most hilarious nursing acronym definitions

1.) PITA—Pain in the As$
Usage: The patient’s whiny girlfriend is such a PITA!

2.) BATS—Broke to All Sh*t
Usage: That poor kid has a BATS fracture from falling out of a tree.

3.) FMPS—“Fluff My Pillow” Syndrome
Usage: Watch out for room 304; she’s got a real case of FMPS.

4.) CAH—Crazy as Hell
Usage: The patient is sweet, but I’m diagnosing his mother with CAH.

5.) FTF—Failure to Fly
Usage: She broke her leg jumping off the roof—I’m diagnosing it as a FTF.

6.) NPS—New Parent Syndrome
Usage: Baby had hiccups, sent home. NPS.

7.) BONITA—Big Ol’ Needle in the As$
Usage: I’m about to give this patient a BONITA.

8.) RN—Refuses Nonsense
Usage: Do you see RN after my name? It stands for Refuses Nonsense!

9.) FDGB—Fall Down Go Boom
Usage: Looks like he broke his arm in a FDGB accident.

10.) GOMER—Get Out of My ER!
Usage: The patient is just looking for drugs—he needs to GOMER!