Gaining confidence

100 days until graduation! Then it’s NCLEX and then ::POOF!::  the letters “RN, BSN, PHN” follow my name (going to register for a PHN certificate too!). That’s more letters than my first and last name put together! And while the whole prospect of being a nurse is super exciting yet still very scary, I am starting to notice a big change in myself. I was talking to a friend the other day about how different things are when you’re really put into the nursing environment without a teacher checking up on your every move, or the pressure of what paperwork you need done for class.
It’s the little things that used to get me so worked up and anxious. Drawing up medication, priming IV tubing, dealing with IV pumps, dressing changes. Those basic nursing skills that you’re still trying to do by remembering the steps in the book rather than thinking through it in relation to real life and your situation then and there. You start to learn that there is nothing scary about your meds, just have a second set of eyes double check what you’re not sure about. And double check yourself. That if you just think through the situation, it starts to make sense, and the next step comes naturally to you, rather than as a foreign thought you’re trying to dig up from last week’s reading.

It’s all starting to come together and I am feeling myself become familiar with the routine. Familiar, but not yet comfortable. There’s still a lot to learn and a lot to understand, and much more time management to get used to. But there’s definitely a change that I am seeing. A light at the end of the tunnel, and a tiny bounce of confidence in my step when I leave a room knowing that I accomplished something on my own. To all student’s out there: there will come a day when you won’t feel so confused. It doesn’t come at once, but when you start to feel it, you’ll remember that you’re that much closer to your goal!