â—Â Â Â Â I will give up chocolate. Really. Honest. Why is everybody laughing?
â—Â Â Â Â I will stop blaming my electronic charting errors on magnetic storms and nearby lightning.
â—Â Â Â Â I will not bore my NM by calling in with the same old excuse. I will come up with creative, exciting reasons why I can’t make it in to work.
â—Â Â Â Â I will grow into my weight. By December 2011, I expect to be 9 feet tall.
â—Â Â Â Â I will stop looking for arcane wisdom hidden in my patients’ tattoos.
â—Â Â Â Â I will refrain from sneering at anyone who has more than five body piercings but claims to be afraid of needles.
â—Â Â Â Â I will never give a laxative and a sleeping pill to a patient at the same time. Even if I’m going off duty immediately thereafter.
â—Â Â Â Â I will no longer shout “Hooray!” and throw confetti when a PITA decides to go AMA. At least not where anyone can see me.
â—Â Â Â Â The words “Hey, we could all use a little diversion around here” will never come out of my mouth again.
â—Â Â Â Â I will buy all of my lotto tickets at a luckier store—and finally get the clerk to give me my money back for all the defective tickets I bought before!
What’s your New Year’s resolution?
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