Many of my wildest stories are not fit to print. Seriously, I don’t want to be responsible for anybody’s children learning something naughty or trying to replicate a terrible situation. But the following story is kind of amusing.
So this girl comes into the ED soaking wet with a laceration on her head and vomit on her shirt. She also has ice on one of her hands. We’re thinking, whoa! this must have been one terrible fight and she must have a serious head injury!!
Here’s what happened: The girl had gone out hiking with Max (short for Maximillion) her beloved chocolate lab and returned home as usual. While patting Max she noted a tick on under the dog’s armpit. She quickly “Googled” ‘how to remove ticks” and found one suggestion that said to light a match and hold it to the ticks butt and the heat will make it back out. (Can you see where this is going?)
As she is getting closer to the dog (who, by the way, could care less about the tick) the match is getting hotter and lights a portion of the dog’s fur on fire. While she is trying to put it out, the dog freaks out and tries to bite the girl. This obviously scares her and she leaps back and falls into her brand new fish tank (so new there weren’t even fish in it yet, just the water). The glass breaks cutting her head, the dog freaks out and vomits on her, she slips while trying to get up and dislocates her middle finger.
She ended up being fine, good ol’ Max was fine, and I still wonder what ever happened to that tick.