Categories: Break RoomScrubs

10 rules for nursing students

10. No matter how bad things are now, they will end. You will eventually be a nurse, subject to redefining hell. Of course, you’ll also redefine happiness.

I can’t tell you how much weight I lost the last six weeks of nursing school. The speculation on class ranking had really ramped up, and as immune as I tried to stay, I still felt the pressure to come in first. I think the under on me was something like 10 points.

But it ended. Valedictorian means s–t in the world, except that older nurses will expect you to be able to recite the latest information on disease X without pausing, like a computer.

And you know what? Being a nurse is infinitely easier than being a student. For one thing, being pushed out of the nest means not only the freedom to screw up, it means the freedom to make judgments. You’re not really allowed to do that as a student. For another, you’re finally done with those f&%$ingcare plans. For a third, you’re able to sleep without dreaming that you’ve missed a test or three. Instead, you dream of beeping IV pumps.

To all those poor sots out there who have three, or two, or just one semester to go before the NCLEX, I raise a toast. Nursing is not the hardest job in the world. Being a nursing student is.

Oh, I forgot one thing:

11. Comfortable shoes. Comfortable shoes. Comfortable shoes. Comfortable shoes. Comfortable shoes, fer Godssake!

This post originally appeared in The Head Nurse blog.

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Agatha Lellis

Agatha Lellis is a nurse whose coffee is brought to her every morning by a chipmunk. Bluebirds help her to dress, and small woodland creatures sing her to sleep each night. She writes a monthly advice column, "Ask Aunt Agatha," here on Scrubs; you can send her questions to be answered at askauntieaggie@gmail.com.

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